Why are some people happier than others?
When a person states, "I want to be happy", they are viewing their current situation as unhappy. This implies that they are devoid of happiness, which in most cases is simply not true.
A person whose life is devoted to the pursuit of pleasure & self-gratification at all costs will hold the belief that instant gratification will bring happiness.
Instant gratification may create pleasure, however it is only satisfying half of the necessary equation to becoming happier.
The same applies for the person whose life is devoted to the delay of pleasure in the belief that gratification will become a reality at 'some point in the future', however it will impede this opportunity to manifest if we enjoy any of the pleasure now. For example, work hard and save hard now, no matter what, & you will have a nest egg to enjoy in "the future." This action of constant delayed-gratification is once again only satisfying half of the necessary equation to becoming happier.
THE ANSWER TO BECOMING HAPPIER:
As a species we are designed to survive above all other purposes. Therefore by default, we are designed to feel emotions of pleasant and unpleasant in equal proportions.
Unpleasant emotions are experienced in order to change a pattern of behavior (in order to survive); whereas pleasant are the emotions of reward for making the change.
The simple answer to happiness (or in fact becoming happier) is found through the ability to gratify both the will for pleasure, & the will for meaning. There is a synergistic relationship between the present tense 'pleasure' & the future tense 'meaning'.
The actions taken in each present moment, in pursuit of future reward, gives the whole scenario a 'meaning', thus creates a positive emotional reward now, and carries this forward (on-going) as we head toward the goal.
DOING WHAT BRINGS YOU JOY
Experiencing positive emotions in the present moment by doing what brings you joy, coupled with the actions holding a meaning toward future benefits, creates ongoing emotional rewards.
Importantly, understanding the necessity for struggles to arise along the journey, because these create stimulus to succeed, is where the pursuer learns to view unpleasant emotions as equally & as necessary as pleasant.
Awareness of the necessity for unpleasant & pleasant moments to exist equally, in order to maintain a steady course toward the goal, is where we find the pathway to Happiness.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Born in Sydney Australia in 1963.
Paul is a practitioner of *naturopathy, certified life coach, certified reflexologist, & certified naturopathic usui shiki ryoho reiki therapist. He is also a published author of a self-help series of books, and Podcast host of Mindfulness Mondays
Paul specializes in mindfulness-based practices.
* Naturopaths use natural therapies to treat pathology or diseases and dysfunctions.
For more information on Paul Pettit - http://www.paulpettit.com